The Hangover

Now why can't they make this movie?

Oh crap my head is killing me! Shit I did it again.....I had way to much to drink at my party last night and now I'm laying in my bed regretting it! I don't even remember how I got into my bed.....I had about twenty five of my friends over and a few couples. I looked down and realized I was butt naked but for some reason I still had on my Timbs? When I realized that I was naked I felt a deep, dull pain in my ass...WTF? I went to try and get up I nearly fell over because I was still a little dizzy....ok really dizzy and could barely see from my hangover. I reached back and felt my ass and flinched when my hand made contact...Ooowwwww....shit! I went into the bathroom to try to get a good look at my ass.....HOLY SHIT, I screamed! There were a series of marks going across my ass and a bunch of raised welts! I tried to focus on what happened last night but the harder I tried the less I could remember...Damn. Did somebody beat my ass? There were no other marks or bruises anywhere else on my body....it was all just on my ass and the more I came out of my alcohol related stupor the more the pain intensified! I got my usual hangover remedy out of my medicine cabinet and took it. Ugghhhh....damn my ass is on fire now! I went back into my bedroom and was ready to call a few of my friends to try and piece last night together when I noticed that my computer was on but it had a different wallpaper on it....as I got closer the screen started to come into focus....It was me....or should I say my ass! I was face down on my bed with my bare ass sticking straight up! What the hell is this I thought.......who did this and why? I looked at the computer screen again and saw that there were no marks on my ass.....yet! I looked around the screen and noticed a Word icon on the side of the screen so I opened it up, and it read.......

Hey Trey, how's that ass feeling this morning? I'm guessing not to well.......Man you gotta learn how to handle your drinking yo.....we were all having a good time until you started acting all stupid...as usual! You said some pretty mean and rude things to your guests last night so most of them left and when everybody was gone I came back in to see if your sorry ass was ok and found you passed out cold so I carried you upstairs and decided that you needed a good lesson so I stripped off your clothes but left your boots and cap on....you just looked so cute that way...LOL. I took off my belt and laid into your big ass! I gave you at least 30 good licks before I stopped. Just so you know you got a good ass whuppin for acting a fool at your own party by one of your friends! I know you want to know who did this but I'm not saying....just think of this as an intervention that you were long overdue for from your friends! I'm sure your head will be feeling better in a little while but not your ass.....I think your gonna be feeling that for a few days! Ps: I'm gonna hold on to this photo until you change your drinking habits!

Fuck, I thought......who the hell did this? Who ever it was......was strong enough to carry me upstairs, shit all my friends worked out.....it still could of been anyone of them! My computer didn't have a password so any of them could of gotten on that too. My ass hurt so bad at this point I had actual tears running down my face......I went back to my bed and lied down on my stomach and cried myself to sleep thinking about who did this...how can I look any of them in the eye again. One of them knows.....and I'll figure it out......I will......Zzzzzzzzzz